Sweet dreams, my love

Paws, lovingly nicknamed "MegaPaws", passed away this morning after a really terrible 48 hours, the worst of his last 4 weeks.
He spiraled downward so quickly in his last 24 hours and finally let me know he was not going to be able to recover from this most recent, unrelenting episode.

I will upload photos and videos sometime soon so we can remember Paws in the happy times, and not just during his sickness.

Thank you to everyone for their love and support, and for all the messages and calls too.

Right now, Momma is crying and cuddling with his brother, Trot, and are going to get through this difficult time together.

Like Paws always says, "Big love & Woofs to all."

Woof.

So sorry to disappoint, but...

still not doing well.

After what Momma thought was going to be a good night because I didn't get sick, she has been following me around with the WetVac for the last 3 hours.  These pictures show why.

See the food?  I ate that at 9:30pm LAST NIGHT.  It just sits in my esophagus while trying to get into my tummy.  So when it comes back up, it looks just like when it went in. 

Pretty icky so sorry if it grosses you out, but it's what Momma deals with everyday.

For now, Momma gave me more medicine but it really needs to stay in my tummy.
So cross your paws.

Woof!

How much will the feeding tube cost?

Momma is being asked by many people how much my feeding tube will cost.  
First, thank you so much to everyone for your interest, kindness and support.

So far, it looks like it will be nearly $2,500, after all is said and done - surgery, bloodwork, anesthesia, formulas, equipment, etc.
She is waiting for an itemized list from the specialty vet and will then have more information.
But it's going to cost a lot.

Momma's not sure how just yet, but she says I WILL get the tube.
She says people will love me and want to help me.  I sure hope so.

Momma will post the information as soon as the vet gets it to her, but she wanted to pass along what she knows so far.

Thanks for your love to everyone!!

Woof!

Maybe a "tiny" jinx yesterday...

Perhaps I jinxed us just a tiny bit when I told you how well I was doing yesterday.
I was fine all night until 5am when I started to regurgitate again.
And it's continued all day.


It's really because I just like to give Momma more work to do.  Even though she uses the WetVac to clean up after me, she still has to empty and clean it out. (What a yucky job!  PEE-YOO!)
WOL!  I love you Momma!


Momma is still feeding me the frozen meatballs today but cut my last 2 meals down to 3/4 of a can.  So I'm getting shortchanged BIG TIME today.  But she says she just can't stuff me with too much food otherwise it never goes down.  (This is where the feeding tube would come in handy.)


And every now and then a FULL one comes back up.  Guess it just sits in my esophagus waiting for its turn to get into my tummy.  But before it can get there, it just comes back up - and yes, it's thawed out by then.  But it's still in the fully-rounded shape of a meatball.  WOL!


And it's a very rainy day here in New England so I keep testing Momma every time she brings me to go potty.


You see...I LOVE to lick up the puddles.  BUT...then I get sick.  She even tries to put a muzzle on me so I can't drink, but I figure out how to get sips anyway.   I'm just a very thirsty puppy.  Momma says it's good that I'm still thirsty.  It's when I stop drinking that worries her.


Anyway, til next time.
Big love & Woofs to all!


Woof!

Momma told me not to jinx it, but...

...I wanted to tell you anyway.

I held down my dinner last night and we all got some sleep (finally - after 3 sleepless nights). Momma woke me up at 3:30am for my medicine, then we went right back to sleep.

And right now, three hours later, I'm holding down breakfast (a can of ground food made into frozen meatballs and 4oz of a milkshake - a total of 625 calories).

While I'm not nearly out of the woods yet, if I can continue like this for a few days, I might be on my way to recovery from this latest episode.

Momma received the report from the vet about my Wed. visit. She has more questions she needs answered about the feeding tube, procedure, costs, care, etc. Once she has those answers, Momma says she will start a campaign to raise that money so I can get the tube and recover from future episodes more quickly.

For right now, I'm just glad the last three meals have gone better than the last three weeks.

Keep your paws crossed for my 3pm lunch to go well too!

Woof!!

Still not doing well - Friday night, quick update

Momma and I are sitting here after I just finished eating a whole can of food. I ate half a can of food this afternoon and some ice but kept half of it down during the last six hours. And this morning, I didn't want to touch any food.


I haven't been well at all since Tuesday night when I started to get sick again (after I had an ok Mon. and Tues, after the previous two weeks of a nightmare.).


I had to fast overnight in case the vet wanted to do blood tests on Wed.
And I haven't been well since.


Tuesday night, Wednesday afternoon and night, all day yesterday and last night, Momma's best friends were put to good use - Bounty and the WetVac. I just couldn't keep anything down. No food. No liquid. No medicine. 


I had her cleaning up a minefield of mess all over the kitchen and living room - all day and night. And then I pant and pace all the time, so Momma tried like crazy to settle me down. Didn't work, but at least I know she loves me.


When we saw the vet on Wednesday, she said that these are exactly the times when the feeding tubes would be used - for when I'm having my episodes and I can't keep anything down. Momma could still feed me by the feeding tube so I can still get liquid and nutrition. And then when I'm feeling better, Momma can feed me like normal.


But right now, we don't have the feeding tube so Momma has to keep trying to feed me the normal way - which obviously isn't working too well lately. These last 3 weeks have been so tough.


Momma will fill in more details about the vet visit tomorrow but she just wanted me to give a quick update and let everybody know that we are still hanging in here.


Tonight, both Momma and I wish we had that tube already. It would start to make me feel a lot better. If I could just eat and keep it in, then I can get back to my old self in no time.


Then it will be back to eating pot roast (I'll never stop dreaming), bossing Trot around and moving Momma off that couch - it's still mine, Momma!! Don't get too comfy!!


Cross your paws dinner stays well and we all can try to have a better night.


Woof!

Back to regular food today - so far, so good

Well, Momma weaned me off the frozen meatballs and put me back on my dry food mix because it's less expensive than the canned food.


She grinds up the dry food into powder using the food processor, then mixes it with water, letting it sit in the fridge for a few hours to absorb the water - making my own ground food - which I still love to pretend tastes like pot roast.  Yum!


So far, I'm keeping it down (knock on wood).


My IV started to leak again today so tomorrow, when we see the new vet, hopefully, they will decide what to do.  Gotta figure out a way to keep hydrated.


I'm going to a new special vet to see if a feeding tube will be better for me.
Neither Momma nor I have any idea of what to expect.


Cross your paws!!


Woof!

Let's catch up, shall we?

Let's see...looks like this current "challenge" in our lives started about 3 weeks ago, so I'm very behind on my doggy-blogging duties.
But Mommy could make it a lot easier for me if she would just hold the laptop for me (oh wait...that's right...she actually hasn't been all that well, either.)
Ok, so we have both been neglecting our fans and furpals.

But I'm back.  Wanna know what we've up to?


Let's go back a bit...yes, quite a bit...


Sun, Mar 25
I had my first attack of pain - not sure what happened, but I just started yelping and ran to Momma for help.  Momma wasn't sure what it was either, but she just stayed with me, petting my neck and back until I settled down.  Good Momma, good. WOL.


Mon, Mar 26
Another pain attack and more yelping. 

Then Momma got a cut on her hand and had to go to the ER - and by ambulance no less.She drops like a tree at the sight of her own blood.  
Mine, Trot's, the kitties or anyone else's...she's a hero.
Hers? Thud.
(But really...she's just trying to steal my thunder.  WOL!)


Tue, Mar 27
All seemed ok.  Both Momma and I were doing well.


Wed, Mar 28
Ok - now Momma was REALLY trying to steal my audience as her hand and arm became so infected it looked like a cooked lobster.
So she had to go to the ER (again), per her own doctor, this time.

There, they gave her IV antibiotics, so at least she got a taste of what I have to go through when she hooks me up to all of those bags and tubes.  WOL!

But then later that night, I had another one of my painful attacks and Momma decided to call the vet in the morning.


Thu, Mar 29
The vet scheduled an appt late in the day, because in the meantime, Momma had another return visit to the ER where they told her they wanted her to stay in the hospital for monitoring and IVs, but she told them about me and they compromised.

Instead, she had to return every day for a week to get a daily IV of antibiotics.  So she came home that very afternoon to bring me to the vet.

While on the way to the vet, Momma, Trot & myself were rear-ended at an intersection (really, folks, even Lassie couldn't make up this stuff).  No one was hurt, but was someone playing with a St. Bernard voodoo doll somewhere?

Vet said she thought I have a slipped disc in my neck, gave me more medications, and did some Laser therapy on me.  Mmmm...my neck was all warm and cozy.  But...I had another attack around midnight.

And then, I decided to stop eating and just started to throw up everything Momma put in my tummy - food, ice, medicine.  Yuck.

So for Momma and me...Thursday was a very long day.

ps - Great news though (sorta) - I weighed in at 135lbs - up 20 lbs from October.  But bad news on the way...see Apr. 2.


Fri, Mar 30
Momma continued to go to the hospital for her anitibiotics.

Memere & Pepere (French for Gramma & Grampa) said they were going to visit over the weekend.  And Memere was actually going to stay for a whole week!!

We love when they visit!!

But I continued to go downhill, not eating and throwing up all of my medicine.


Sat, Mar 31
Momma went back to the hospital for another IV...again.

Then, Memere & Pepere arrived.  BIG WOOFS from me and Trot!!

Pepere moved our kennel onto the patio so I could stop eating grass and dirt, which Momma thinks was the biggest contributer to my upset tummies.

I still couldn't eat real food all day and Momma kept trying to give me the medicine I needed.  But I threw it up all night.

Poor Memere & Pepere - I think I kept them up most of the night too.  Momma and I are used to it, but not Memere and Pepere.


Sun, Apr 1
More antibiotics at the hospital for Momma...

Pepere returned home, and...

Memere stayed for the week - just to be with ME!!  
(ok, maybe it's not really the case - but in my mind, she wanted to visit her favorite St. Bernard - and yes, of course, her favorite Germand Shepard too.  Momma keeps reminding me not to leave Trot out of my blog.  WOL!  Ok ok....and maybe Memere was here to see Momma too!)

But I just keep throwing up my medicine.  Momma didn't even try to feed me today.
She was just hoping I could keep my medicine down, but that didn't work.

I'm AM thirsty though because every time Trot drinks from his water dish, I'm right there too.
Of course, neither Momma nor Memere let me have anything, but Momma says it's a good sign that at least I want to drink.

So, we're off to the vet again tomorrow.


Mon, Apr 2
Momma keeps going to get those bags of IV antibiotics.  What a pain.
At least mine can be done in the comfort of my own doggie bed!!

Memere and Momma keep trying to get my meds to stay down but I had to go to vet since Momma said I was getting too bad.

Turns out she was right:  since my last visit only on Thurs., I lost 17 lbs and was now down to 117.  Vet says mostly because I was so dehydrated.

So I went home with a catheter so Momma could give me my own IV liquids.  Now whose thunder is stolen?!?  WOL!  (Still woof ya Momma!  It's ok.  Like you always say, we're in this together!!)


Tue, Apr 3
More antibiotics for Momma and more liquids for me.
I'm still not eating yet, but Momma and Memere can already see a difference.  
And I just want to keep drinking Trot's water.  
Hopefully, Momma will give me ice cubes soon.


Wed, Apr 4
Uh-oh.  Another pain attack.  My, and I was doing so well without them!!
Momma just rubs my back until I settle down.  Yikes!  What is that?!?!

At least is was the last day of antibiotics for Momma - yippee!!


Thu, Apr 5
I'm still vomiting all of my medicine - including the $20/dose antibiotics Momma had to buy - and she bought a bottle of 5 doses.

But I have thrown up 2 doses so far.  Sorry Momma. 
(No worries, she says to me all the time, and just gives me big, dry human kisses.)

So tomorrow, she will get an injectable antibiotic that will go right into my IV line.  That should be much better.


Fri, Apr 6
Momma continued to see her doctors (for her hand and then some others too - she has lots of doctors, but this isn't her story...it's ALL about ME!!  WOL!)

Then, on her way home, she picked up more IV bags and the special antibiotic.  And was told that the vet wanted to see me again on Monday and wanted to have the "Quality of Life" talk with Momma.  Uh-oh.

Pepere came back - Woof! - to get Memere to bring back home - un-Woof!
But it's so nice to see my favorite grandparents!!

And big news...Momma stopped my medicines - all of them, except the injectable antibiotic.
Since I'm not holding anything down anyway, why keep making me go through the motions of regurgitating?  Good thinking Momma...


Sat, Apr 7
...Because now that she stopped the medicines, I haven't vomited all night.  
What a relief!!  Finally!!
And later in the day...she even gave me 3 ice cubes.
BIG Woofs!!  (and amazingly, I kept them down!!)


Sun, Apr 8
Still no meds.  Still no vomiting.  Go figure!!  Maybe Momma's on to something!!

So guess who got to eat 6 frozen meatballs today??

But my IV doesn't seem to be working anymore.
It took 3 hours to empty a bag, whereas it was only taking 30 minutes earlier this week.
Momma says I might need a new line so we'll haved it checked at tomorrow's appt.


Mon, Apr 9
More meatballs.  More ice cubes.  No getting sick.

Then...the vet visit.

And phew!  The vet was so surprised and happy to see that I was back to my perky ol' self.
Even when the tech brought in a bowl of water for another laser treatment on my neck (they use it to wet down my hair), I followed her around the room, in hopes she'd give me some.  no luck, but a boy's gotta try!!

So they all had a chuckle and the vet agreed it was't quite the time for the "Quality of Life" talk with Momma.  But she did say that she didn't think I'd make it through another one of these bad episodes.

Her suggestion, if money were no object, is to put in a feeding tube because no matter how much Momma tries to feed me, I just won't be able to gain the weight or muscle back that I really need without specialized formulas that they can use with feeding tubes.
So this means more vet visits.  Darn.

And since money IS really an object, Momma is really going to have to figure out what to do.
And fast.

Well...at least I'm the best patient they say they've ever had.  WOL!
Especially when I'm getting my IV lines inserted or checked - I just lie there.
Let them do there thing.
Then get praised for doing nothing.
WOL WOL WOL!!  I know how to work the system!!


Tue, Apr 10
Speaking of IV lines...I had to get a new one.  Even though they checked it yesterday, it just stopped working today.  And again...best patient ever!!

Then, Momma had to go to the human hospital to pick up more injectable antibiotics for me.  Did you know you can do that?

Anyway, I'm eating more and more meatballs and eating more ice cubes.  Big Woofs!!


Wed, Apr 11
Quiet day...shhh...don't jinx it!!


Thu, Apr 12
Yup.  It got jinxed.
Today, my new IV line got infected and my leg began to swell and get red and hot - just like Momma's arm did last week.  
So Momma pulled the catheter and tomorrow, it's back to the vet.

But more meatballs and no getting sick.  
I'm really starting to like this!!


Fri, Apr 13
Back to the vet. 

Trot too, this time - he has a hot spot that he keeps licking - bad Trot, bad.  And he DID NOT like it when the vet put a needle with some steroids into it.  Woof - did he bark and yelp!!

As for me...my legs just did not want a new IV line - too swollen and irritated.  So they wrapped me up and we're back in the morning.

(Geez - we should just move our beds into their office - WOL!!)


Sat, Apr 14
New IV line.  
3 EASY bags of fluids.  
3 full meals of frozen meatballs!!

Pretty good day for Mr. MegaPaws, if I do say so myself.
(And I do.  WOL!)


Sun, Apr 15
More fluids - nice and easy.  
More meatballs for breakfast and lunch.
Then meatballs AND pure canned food cut into chunks for dinner - BIG WOOFs!
Now that's progress.

I had a bit of a hard time overnight though (Sunday into Monday) - gurgled alot since I had such a big dinner.  
So Momma is just going to give me a bigger breakfast and lunch, and then a smaller dinner - so we can all have a better time overnight tomorrow.

We really need our beauty sleep.  
Well, just Momma and Trot, really.  
I'm already the best looking St. Bernard around!!  WOL WOL!


Mon, Apr 16
More good fluids.  
More meatballs and canned food.
More ice cubes - AND Momma added in a little bit of milkshake too!
Big breakfast and lunch so far.  Smaller dinner later.

Momma got more bags of fluid too!  So you'd think everything is on the up-and-up, right?
But...not everything is as pretty as it seems.  (Get ready.)

What I haven't disclosed yet is that I have had terrible "runs" since Saturday.
Just plain explosive.  (Sorry to the squeemish, or those who have never had pets - or even children, for that matter - WOL!)

Apparently, the antibiotics are wreaking havoc on my stomach.
So let's cross our paws that goes away soon.  
Poor Momma (and yes, poor me too!)


Anyway, another meal and IV are in store for later this evening.

And then of course, another middle-of-the-night session later - although that's just a tiny "snack", really.  IMHO, of course.
Momma says it's just enough to get me to stop whining in the middle of the night.

But hey, at least I'm hungry!!  And eating!!  And not getting scik!!


And, Yes - food and fluids 4 times a day - you do the math - every 6 hours - good for me since I get to eat, then just sit or lie there.  
But not so much for Momma.  She can't go to sleep since she has to watch my IV bag so it doesn't run empty.  But I keep promising her, I'll be better soon.


In fact, we see a special vet on Wed. who will give us more information about a feeding tube.
Let's cross our paws!!


All is ok for now.  I'll keep you updated.


And I want to say a very special Thank You to all of my fans, friends, followers, and especially to my furpals!!  Big Love & Woofs to you all!




Woof!

To all my furpals and friends...

I'm writing to say that Momma and I need to take another week off.  I am really having another bad episode, since Thursday - which is when I also saw the vet who thinks I might have a slipped disc in my neck - so now I have meds for that as well.

Right now, I'm not eating and will not keep anything down - not even my medicine.  Momma also sees "streaks" of blood in my regurgitation - so tomorrow has another trip to vet on my schedule.

Momma says "streaks" are better than clots or pools.  Streaks usually mean that my esophagus is irritated.  But any blood still just isn't good.  We'll see what the vet says - I'm sure more antibiotics are in store.

Now I'm not supposed to tell you this, but Momma has been in and out of the ER all week, so she's a bit out of commission too and we are really not doing well on the computer this week.  Give us another few days and I'll bet I'll be back to my doggy-blogging in no time.

But I just wanted to give a big WOOF to all of my friends and especially my Twitter followers, RTers, DMs and Mentions for right now.  And REALLY big WOOFs to my friends who have sent donations too!  Your love is much appreciated and Momma and I will thank everyone personally when we get back online.

Big Puppy Love to you all!
We'll be back soon.
(Right now, I actually have to go cuddle Momma - she needs a great big wet, doggy kiss!!)

Woof!!